Conflicted

Today I woke up thinking about how yesterday morning I was PSYCHED! I had mentally calculated and dreamed about having success in my weight loss journey. If only I would lose so many pounds, in so many weeks, I COULD get down to my goal weight. I called my dad and talked to him about my plans. I called my husband and asked for his help. I was READY to do this!! I downloaded an app to help me prepare to run a 10K. I went to the gym for an hour. Then, it happened - what seems to happen every single day of my life. The hours of the day ticked by. I became busy with emails, music, the responsibilities of my day and the evening had come. My PSYCHED moment from the morning had been forgotten and the Couch Potato monster came out. ALL the motivation left my brain and I fell into the routine of wanting to be entertained and treating myself to whatever food calls my name. With all the successes of the morning, I still turned around and ate pretzels and ice cream as I watched American Idol. UGH!!!

I feel like Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde, but truth is this is the human condition. I am so thankful for God's Word and the many truths written by His people. Paul writes in Romans 7:15 "I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do." YES - that is me and I surmise every single person at one point in their lives. Thankfully, God doesn't leave us hangin'! He always masterfully provides His answer. In verse 24 Paul says, "What a wretched man I am! WHO will rescue me from this body of death?" The answer? Verse 25, "Thanks be to God - through Jesus Christ our Lord."

I will NEVER be perfect, even as a Christ-follower, but God does promise to rescue me from my sin. His forgiveness allows me to leave the past behind and look to the future. God offers to extend to me His grace, His power to overcome the sin in my life. It's not easy, but I believe every step is and will be worth it in the end. I have to obey. I have to seek Him. I have to avoid temptation. I have to use the common sense God has given me. Most importantly, I have to have faith that God is faithful to follow through with His promises and give me what I need to be who He wants me to be.

Philippians 1:6 says, "...He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus."

Now that is EXCITING!!! I believe it! God has a good work for MY life - YES!! So, I am going to get PSYCHED again this morning, go the gym again today, maybe put up some skinny pictures to inspire myself and I am going to have faith that God will help me overcome this battle.

I don't feel so conflicted anymore....